How can I best help my teenager prepare for college?

Waving your teenager off to college is a milestone and will bring about changes that it will take the whole family a while to get used to. It is natural to feel quite stressed as you get ready for the big day when your teenager heads off to college. If arguments are flaring up near to the move time, talk about how you are feeling but remember to try not to make your child feel guilty about flying the nest as this will cause resentment.

You may be anxious about your teenager's life skills as they prepare to live away from home for the first time and worry if they will manage their money, be able to make a decent meal and not spend all their time at the student union making the most of the cheap beer! At the same time, you will have aspirations for your child and hope they get a good education and a headstart in life.

Money matters

You may have heard scary stories about rocketing fees and students being left with massive debts so it is well worth talking to your teenager about the importance of budgeting. Encourage them to work out how much they can afford to spend on items like food, clothes, going out and to stick to it as best they can. Suggest that they keep a note of when they use the cash machine - it's easy to forget those late-night tenners and they quickly mount up. If your teenager is going to receive one or more lump sums, they would be better off setting up an instant-access savings account so that they can earn some interest on the money until they need to spend it.

Sex, drugs and alcohol

Keep talking about responsibility and choice. Let them know you understand that drinking, trying drugs or having sex may be a part of college life but that if they experiment, they must be responsible and avoid taking undue risks. Talk about the risks of pregnancy, catching an STD (sexually transmitted disease) accidental overdose, a bad 'trip', having an accident or unwanted sex. The choices they make will help to keep them safe and well. Talk about safe choices and options - not going out late alone, knowing how they will get home, keeping in touch by mobile and letting a friend know where they are going. Keep on about condoms as they protect against pregnancy and STDs. Let them know they can call you for help if they need you. If you don't text and email, why not learn? It's a great way of keeping in touch with your teenager while they're away.

And when you do finally wave them off, try to do something for yourself that you may not have had time for before. And remember that they'll soon be back in the holidays, so prepare yourself for this if you have got used to having the place to yourself!

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